Rothko, Red, and Me

Mark Rothko won a Tony award last night. Did I say that right? Well, the play about Rothko won the award, but for me it was the artist. His canvases were portrayed as characters in the riveting drama. They were on stage in all their glorious reds, larger than life. They, however, were not on last night's slate of nominees, yet Eddie Redmayne and Alfred Molina were,for their portrayals of the artist and his young apprentice. If you haven't seen the play yet, please go. It has a limited run, as did Rothko in his life, but oh what a monumental legacy he left. It all brings me to a question I have been asking since my teens, the one about whether or not an artist has be a tortured soul in order to produce great work. In my teens I wrote dark poetry. I felt alone and set apart from the world. My poems were written on napkins and the backs of text books or wherever I could find a small space to express the thoughts that streamed across my subconscious. I don't believe I was a tortured soul, nor do I believe my work was great, but when I wasn't feeling pain or some type of self-inflicted suffering, I don't think I felt the need to write. Many of my favorite artists lived short lives of torment and suffering. We know about Van Gogh. He tells us as much in his writings to Theo. But in his work there is light and soul. Unlike the Art Brut artists, his paintings do not reflect angst and pain. In Van Gogh we find the search for the spiritual. I didn't know much about Rothko until I finally stopped long enough to inhale the intensity of his paintings, while at MOMA one day. And inhale I did. I breathed in the depth of his colors and the brushstrokes that seemed to go on and on. I knew nothing about his life at that time, but I felt a connection. I am often told that my work makes people happy. One woman recently wrote that after coming from a bereavement group, she came to a recent show I had and looking at my paintings made her smile. My paintings were bright and cheerful. How much more could I want? The world is sometimes so dark. Maybe it is no different than it ever was. As artists, what could be better than bringing some light into the world? I suppose I answered my own question.